Submerged - review

[Nick]

Don't we always agree? Thought we had that special male bond formed Haa I mean you aren't like Amos who agreed with me once. This is a repetitive chain of events Or common sense

 

[Littledragon]

Don't we always agree? Thought we had that special male bond formed Haa I mean you aren't like Amos who agreed with me once. This is a repetitive chain of events Or common sense

Naw I agree with you Nick, on this subject.. Submereged sucked!

 

[Littledragon]

Amazon.com User Average Review.

Submerged has been given a sad 2 out of 5 stars from the users at Amazon.com One of the lowest ratings out of all his films.

 

[Nick]

And there I thought I had a blood brother. A genetically engineered double

 

[aikidoboynj]

i agree with you guys too.. That one reviewer said for his next movie that maybe he will just be laying down on his side for the whole movie...LOL that is the funniest thing I've ever read on here, it's kinda sad to because I could honestly see him laying down on his side for a whole movie, have his voiced dubbed for the whole movie, and have the only action scene when someone trips and falls next to seagal's bed. Guess what, most of the members on this board would give it a 9/10 LOL,,,

 

[GlimmerMan]

GlimmerMan has been and still is my favorite.

 

[GlimmerMan]

Nick - I hear ya buddy. Don't worry - I'll speak my mind whether people like it or not. And if I don't think they read my insane ranting, I'll just post it again.

 

[Nick]

Good to hear you have a mind of your own At times crowds can be intimidating But I picked my ground. I drew the line and I am not about to move

 

[Serena]

Oh yeah, and GlimmerMan the movie wasn't bad either.

 

[Nick]

Perhaps this movie should have never surfaced. This is where all the trouble has began All the arguing and all the chaos. Maybe years from now a NU Image worker would find it and take it home to watch. He would then realize exactly why it was collecting dust under Warning Psychologically Damaging Material Label

 

[Administrator]

Once again this thread is for posting reviews of the movie good or bad.

Every time someone posts a positive review there seems to be a gang of posters saying it was aweful! Please respect each others opinions.

I am beginning to love this movie. I think it is his best movie since Marked For Death.

 

[Storm]

Express your opinion - dont start personally attacking other members with name calling. Not really doing alot for your argument is it?

And can i ask you why you think the Above The Law days are gone?

Ok Billy,fair point. No grudges held. It's gone now.

I would love him to do another Above The Law,but unless he gets a good director and trains hard i doubt we will see the like again. A good budget would help too!

Still hoping for a sequel to Marked For Death

 

[hofmae]

I think its not the fault of the director if Steven doesn't want to spend a lot of time in his movies and can't fight like 10 years ago... Anthony Hickox is a very good B-Movie-Director.

 

[Storm]

aikidoboynj - I just noticed you dragged up one of my posts from a good few pages back - thanks man! I was starting to think that people on here were ignoring me!

Peace,

Glimmer

We go way back and i will never ignore you,even if you are crazy!

 

[GlimmerMan]

We do mate. I'm not really crazy, you know! Mind you, I do share your love for LUFC... after Everton of course, so I can't be totally sane!

Good to hear from ya mate. Hope you are doing well. Take care.

Mike

 

[Administrator]

Submerged (2005)

AKA: n/a

Premise: A scientist in South America, who is performing successful mind control experiments and selling the research to the highest bidder, is tagged by the U.S. government as a threat. After a botched kill mission, a group of imprisoned and expendable special service soldiers, led by Chris Jones (Steven Seagal), are released and sent to finish the job.

Review: Steven Seagal is definitely on a roll, not that I'd call that a good thing. In the last couple years, he's been kicking out mostly poor B-movies faster than a rabbit in heat. Submerged is his second feature in collaboration with B-movie producers Nu Image after the bomb that is Ticker and it's no better. In fact, the producers should have thought twice about a title like Submerged as it leaves a gaping opening for puns to be made. But I promise not to sink to such depths and infer that Seagal ends up all wet.

First off, if you're looking for hardcore Aikido action to be displayed, go check out Seagal's first couple films, 'cause he hasn't gone back since. Submerged attempts to tap into the military action thrill ride that was Under Siege, but ends up with a clunky thriller that tries hard to cover up its many faults with slick, but uneven editing and stylized direction from Anthony Hickox.

Per usual, Seagal is the whispering and shadow-lurking special forces agent, this time released from a military prison with a team of his hard-nosed Navy buddies after suffering from a political cover-up. His second chance comes in the form of taking on the task of taking out a secret base housing a wannabe South American dictator and a crack scientist dabbling in mind control. The film's title refers to his getaway vehicle, a confiscated submarine that also threatens to become his tomb when mind-controlled hostages (including martial arts B-movie star Gary Daniels) attempt a hostile takeover, which makes the entire crew suddenly expendable. Seagal escapes with his surviving team and a mind control specialist to continue tracking the mad scientist, who escaped the attack and has set up operations that involve the planned assassination of a newly elected South American president.

Of director Anthony Hickox, I have to say I absolutely loved two of his early movies, Waxwork and Waxwork II: Lost in Time. Both were low budget send-ups to past cult horror classics, especially the more comical sequel. They were corny and completely over-the-top, but very entertaining. I haven't seen anything of his since, but figured he might be able to infuse a bit of quirkiness to the Seagal franchise. Nothing could be farther from the truth. We get a movie that tries desperately to be a savvy, Tom Clancy-ish military thriller by way of Steven Soderbergh's Traffic on a budget that falls far short of the moviemakers' ambitions. Add to that a goofball plot better suited for an animated episode of G.I. Joe and an equally boneheaded treatment that has Seagal introduced to thumping rock music. All-around bad acting and consistently terrible lighting doesn't help the film's cause either.

The military action scenes, that Nu Image love to play up in their movies, are terrible. Gun fights have shaky cam and squib-popping elements of Black Hawk Down, but really just end up with guys on either side standing or slowly walking in a line ten feet from each other and firing away with machine guns. And just like G.I. Joe or The A-Team, people evade gunfire at close range with fantastic ease. Seagal, with pump-action shotgun in hand, has a slightly better shootout towards the end, but it's nothing we haven't seen countless times before. A scene involving the shoot down of a spy drone is laughable as it looks just like the miniature model that it is, as does the jet fighter that nails it.

As for martial arts, it's more of the same from Seagal. That means limited and ultra fast-edited chaos that makes Seagal look like a tough guy without showing us how he did anything other than flail his arms. Midway through, he does briefly go toe-to-toe with Gary Daniels, an action star of limited acting ability and respectable physical skills when properly highlighted, which is generally never considering his almost endless stream of disposable C-grade movies. It's nothing for genre fans to take even a passing interest in as Daniels' small role is a throwaway and the scene is short and unimpressive.

All I can say for Seagal is that he's starting to creep me out as his career progresses. He's increasingly being shot in shadow with a single light on his face, which makes me want to give him the nickname of "The Lurker." In addition, his strained voice continues to be poorly dubbed, and this time he's trying to sound like a black man with a Cajun accent. Honestly, I have nothing against the guy personally, but he isn't delivering the moves he once did and he's starting to freak me out in a less-talented Marlon Brando fashion. But for some reason Columbia Tristar keeps putting out his direct-to-DVD movies and I keep reviewing them. One can only hope this vicious cycle will one day end with me coming to my senses, Seagal retiring or with Seagal's return to hard-edged Aikido action with improved plots. Considering recent trends, none of the above seem likely.

Rating : 2/5

By Mark Pollard

Source : Kung Fu Cinema

 

[Nick]

It brings tears to my eyes to post Reviews(Amazon) like these


come on steve,you can do better

I actually paid for this dvd,this by far has to be the worst movie he has done.Now don't get me wrong i am still the biggest seagal fan around.although he is not 28 anymore,i think he still can make some kick ass films.What he needs to do is stop having music video guys make his movies,and find a serious director.

Abysmal

I was in the mood for some mindless action entertainment, a la 'Under Seige 2' and all I got was the mindless part. A shockingly bloated and mostly unintelligible Seagal does his best Will Sasso impression here and comes up way short. Sasso should do all future Seagal movies, in fact. The many, many shortcomings of this waterlogged waste of film have already been enumerated here, so no point in rehashing them. This one begs for the full 'Mystery Science Theater' treatment.

Now THAT would make for some worthwhile viewing!

Horrible

I was a Steven Seagal fan in the Out for Justice and Above the Law days, but wow. How can an actor put out such garbage as this? This is the last Seagal DVD I will ever rent. One thing about this movie that I cannot understand is when Seagal is speaking, in some scenes it sounds like him and others it's someone else.....Huh?. Whatever. Avoid this floater at all costs


Actually more like it brings a smile to my lips

Waxwork 1 and 2 are still cult classics. But those are Anthony Hickox's best films. Nothing is going to change the fact that he is an untalented hack. He just experienced luck with those two earlier efforts. Or who knows maybe his strength lies in Horror Genre. Perhaps if Submerged remained a Horror Film we would get a lovely comedy.

 

[GlimmerMan]

Oh dear... I can't wait to see this movie just to see if it's as bad as everyone is making out!

 

[Nick]

The feelings are mutual Glimmer. I am constantly phoning Blockbuster(My Local Store) to check if it has arrived yet. Every five minutes to be specific. I even have them on speed dial now. I basically sleep with my phone. It never leaves my trembling hand from all the excitement. I lay in my bed awake and have dreams of watching this film finally.

That's what is known as sarcasm I am quite sure it will be at my Blockbuster soon enough through.

 

[Littledragon]

Oh dear... I can't wait to see this movie just to see if it's as bad as everyone is making out!

If you are a loyal Seagal fan, yes than you will think Submerged is bad. Take it from me.